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Cheating is self-inflicted pain 11 сентября, 2013

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Coach Herbert -Touching lives,inspiring and mentoring through the written and spoken word!.

Herbert Mtowo

Extramarital affairs and cheating in relationships is unquestionably an act capable of damaging the very foundation of your domestic life and taking away your happiness. It is the sword that cuts the hearts of two former lovers turning them into enemies living under the same roof. And statistics clearly point to cheating as the number one marriage and relationship destroyer. It’s a sobering to realize how many relationships and marriages have died at the mercilessness at its brutality.

Cheating partners are famous for the challenging and agonizing lives they led. If you are cheating on your wife or husband, no matter how you view it, your life will have you running in circles. You will lose your peace right from the inside of you. You will quickly learn that the whimsical happiness that you probably have gained outside your relationship was only temporary and will eventually elude you…

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MY CLASSIC LOVE STORY 21 августа, 2013

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By Herbert Mtowo


Boaz finding Ruth is one of my favorite love stories in the history of humanity. Though many would argue with me and say that finding love is like chasing the wind and an elusive dream and believe you me I am no expert to love and in love, but the few years I have lived on planet earth have been full of countless and precious and worthy lessons on a lot of topical issues to life. Talking about the love of a lifetime many schools of thoughts and theories have been spoken of written when it comes to stumbling on the love that we all cherish and long for. But allow me to approach it from another angle as I open my heart and pour it in black and white, how that life still is the master teacher when it comes to finding true love.

The foundational scripture that I’d like to begin with is 1 John 4:19, «We love God because He FIRST LOVED us.» Do you see the significance of those words? We didn’t chase after God. No, he chased after us. He lured us into a relationship with Him. Romans 3:11 tells us that no one seeks after God without him first seeking after them. It was God who waited at the well to talk with the woman who had already lived with seven men and the man she was with wasn’t even her husband. It was God who asked the questions and then provided the answers that would bring about her deliverance and change her life. That day as she made her way to the well, she wasn’t thinking about whether she would have an meet with God today, no, she was going to get water. But God knew in advance that she would be there and he waited. Then he wooed her with his words.

To my precious Single women friends, how often is this scenario in reverse for you. You get all doled up and go to this or that event, hoping and praying that Mr. Right will find you? I remember growing up my sister at one time confided to me if she can get just a man to give her children she would be happy because she was getting tired by the day of waiting for love, many have died and lived disappointed but hold on for a while and listen to me as you read through this article. Do you ever leave feeling disappointed, especially if you go to a Christian singles’ event and there are 50 women for every one man. The odds really aren’t in your favor.

But I want you to make a shift in your consciousness today. I want you to see the development of a true love relationship, a godly love relationship in a whole new light. I want you to see a love relationship that mimics the relationship that God had with Israel, a prophet had with a prostitute, and Jesus has with the church.

Did you know that God’s relationship with the children of Israel in the Old Testament shows the love that a man is supposed to have for his mate? Are you aware that over and over and over and over in the Bible that God pursued the children of Israel only to be rejected again and again and again? Passage after passage throughout in the Old Testament is God pleading for the children of Israel to love and follow him because He wanted to bless them. Anyone who says God isn’t patient or merciful hasn’t read the Bible. He never gave up; he still hasn’t. These were his people and He loved them despite their bad behavior. All he ever wanted was for them to return and embrace his love.

In fact, he also used the story of Hosea to further depict his love and faithfulness to his people. God put an unconditional love in Hosea’s heart for a prostitute, Gomer and told him to marry her. In Hosea 3:1, God told Hosea, «Love her as the Lord loves the Israelites.» Hosea took Gomer to his home and gave her everything he had. He was crazy over her. But her old ways and life would lure her back into the streets and the arms of other men. Yet, that did not stop Hosea from finding his woman and bringing her back home. That’s how much he loved her.

Did you know that the relationship between Jesus and the church is our model for marriage? The Bible says that «we» are the bride of Christ. In Mark 2:20 Jesus refers to himself as the bridegroom. And because of his love for us, he stepped off his throne in heaven, lived on earth for about 30 years where he was ridiculed and rejected, and then died violently on a cross to restore our relationship back to God so that we could live eternally with Him. Revelations 19:7-9 and 21:1-2 tells about the final wedding that will take place. We are told that at the second coming of Christ, the official wedding ceremony will begin and the eternal union of Christ and his bride (us) will become a reality.

Well as I continued to prepare my writing of this article the Lord spoke to my spirit and said, that if a man is not as crazy and devoted to you as Christ is to the church and God was to the Children of Israel, he is not your bridegroom but a hireling, a fake. Wow! We loved God because HE first loved us. Ladies you are to love the man in our life because «he» first loved you, not because you manipulated, coerced, seduced, or even threatened him in marrying you. As women, you are to be receivers, not chasers. God created the man to choose, to pursue, and to love you and not the other way around. Ephesians 5:25 tells men to love their wives as Christ loved the church. But unfortunately, a role reversal has taken place and women have begun to aggressively chase after men and use any and all means to get them. Ladies, you may get a man, but he won’t be your bridegroom! When God does the choosing he will send him correct and He will put a love in his heart for you that will last longer than a flicker in the night.

I have personally known of men who waited for a woman for YEARS because they knew that woman was the one God had for them; they had eyes for no other. It didn’t matter how cute someone else was, their hearts were taken. Often times the women couldn’t see it. They just weren’t interested at all, but God began to do a work in their heart as well and these marriages are just as strong today as they were years ago.

I know I’m going to sound a bit out there now, but I’m going to say it anyway. Ladies, if the man in your life is not crazy about you, can’t stop thinking about you, doesn’t nurture and cherish you, doesn’t love buying you little things to see you smile, and if that man in your life wouldn’t die for you, he’s not your bridegroom. He is a fake and he’ll never love you like a true groom would. Now you can settle for him just to have somebody and not be alone, but just be clear what you’re doing. However, if you want God’s best, then wait for God to bring him to the well of your heart. Let him ask you for a drink of water but all along his true intentions are to water you with his love, to woo you, and to take you as his own.

Now married to women, your man may have started out thinking you were the cream in his coffee but because of the little foxes that were swept under the rug and not exposed and dealt with, a wall may have surfaced between you. It’s time to cleansing your relationship from everything that stands between you and your man and get those sparks flying again. So don’t despair, just start doing that mental and spiritual cleaning that is blocking the love between you from flowing freely. However, if you settled for a hireling, you may have to work harder to cultivate love and passion in your relationship, but with God all things are possible.

Now to all the men, I told you that you can glean from this article as well because if the woman in your life doesn’t make you a little «coo coo,» when you think about her then she probably isn’t the one either. I believe that when God presents that woman in your life you will eat, breath, dream, and sleep her. You won’t be able to get her out of your mind. It’s like thoughts about her will haunt you, in a good way of course. And yes, you would give her your all, up to the point of your own life. Your love for her will represent the love that Jesus has for the church and God for his people.

Therefore, single women if you are in a relationship and with a man, in which, you are always questioning whether he loves you, you don’t know his intentions, and you are carrying the bulk of relationship, run away, don’t walk. This man is «just not that into you.» Your bridegroom and your Boaz won’t have any problem showing you and telling you how he feels.

Lastly, be patient and as you learned in life`s lessons, learn to have a relationship with yourself and be fun, confident, and a joy to be around. Then one day when you least expect it, he’ll be right there waiting for you and you thought you were just going to buy some lettuce.



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By Herbert Mtowo


Life has taught me that, all critical skills indeed come only when we leave our comfort zones. It would be wonderful if there was a way to comfortably grow. But growth actually stretches our self-confidence to a breaking point. We are no longer able to use those talents and social skills that had become second-nature. We can no longer call upon those who could be relied upon to support us. Instead, we find ourselves suddenly clumsy and with new people who have not yet come to know us and like us.

When you pull away from the things, people, and experiences you are familiar with, when you step out of your comfort zone, you are on a path of growth. This growth, to say the least, is forcing you to stretch, and this stretching is uncomfortable.

Read this through:

Imagine that you are living in a small village. You know everyone. You know what to do, and when. This is your safe and familiar world. But your life calls for you to go beyond your village. Outside the village are resources, more money, more education, and more things that you need to experience. You are forced outside your village because although it is comfortable, it doesn’t have everything you need to survive or succeed in life.

This is how life works. We have our vision, our new purpose, but it is always a little beyond our reach. There is a gap where we are now and where we want to be. And usually, we have a lot of learning and experiencing to do before we can close the gap. You can have your dream, but not the details on how to make it come true. You can make plans, and some plan is better than no plan, but these are only based on what you now know. As you move toward what you are seeking, new knowledge will appear, and you will have to continually revise your plan.

In this world, discomfort is inevitable. Everything in you is calling you to go back to the way things were, even if they were not that good anyway. «Better the devil that you know,» you mutter under your breath, «then the one that you don’t know.» But these are always false assumptions. The reason you need to grow is because your life is not really that comfortable. There is something missing in it. What you take to be comfortable is only what is familiar, but it is not what you need at the moment.

Great true life examples:

Staying at home is comfortable; going to a place to work is uncomfortable. Yet unless you make money, you will lose your home.

Staying at your current weight is comfortable; going to a gym and following a strict diet is uncomfortable. Yet unless you lose excess weight, your health will get worse.

Staying single is comfortable; meeting and dating new people is uncomfortable. Yet unless you find a companion, you will continue to feel shy and lonely.

Outside our comfort zone is something that we need to make us more of who we want to be. There is something we need out there that will help us be successful.

We can, of course, refuse to step outside of our comfort zone, preferring to cope with the limitations within its borders. We can opt for contraction rather than expansion, for stagnation rather than growth. Sometimes, through procrastination, we appear to be doing something about our goals, but, in fact, it is the same thing as complete inaction.

Unless you are willing to face your comfort zone, you will fail to reach your goals, and your power to make positive, life-affirming and expanding decisions will also start to atrophy. Unfortunately, most people choose to honour their comfort zones, and in the process lose out on the opportunity to be, do, and have more of what would truly enrich their lives. The few who do respond to challenge in a positive way are those who start to experience levels of success they would never have dreamed was possible. Stepping outside your comfort zone will teach you more than new social skills; it will also teach you how to orchestrate effective communication skills within you as well.

So many times I have been hit hard had my back against the wall and at the edge of giving up to life, letting go my dreams and pursuits, but something to tells me its time I step out of my comfort zone and reach out to accomplish my dreams, it`s not an easy place to be, but it’s a doable thing. So; I DARE YOU TO STEP OUT AND DISCOVER WHO YOU ARE AND   WHAT YOU ARE MADE UP OF.yes greatness

STAY PUT AND FIGHT!! 17 февраля, 2013

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By Herbert Mtowo

It’s always a nice feeling to watch your competitor pick up their ball and bat, lower their head and walk home pouting. It’s not about having a bully mentality and enjoying others pain because you haven’t dealt with your own personal demons. It’s about not giving up like so many of us do. Who give up-end up rendering themselves useless? Yes, they do.

Staying power is much like a skinny, 5′ 3″ teenage girl bench pressing 150 pounds. It’s not something that most 5′ 3″ teenage girls can do or even fathom trying. With the determined mind-set, she will be able to lift that weight soon enough. You must know what stuff you are made up off, if you are to swim and cross oceans to get to you dreams. Sad though many of us give up too soon, at the slightest opposition and resistance we quit just too soon, fold our hands in despair.

You and me need «Staying Power!” I few are to ever make it in this world and life.

It is the ability to obsessively stay focused on your goal of achieving whatever it is you set out to do without blinking an eye. Similar to chaining yourself to a tree so that the loggers don’t chop it down or your hands are tied behind the chair you’re sitting in, under the hot bright light shined in your face being harshly questioned and you refuse to tell… no matter what, you are committed to stick it out no matter what it takes or how bad it feels.

When you hear about something that is mind-blowing and you want to do the same thing. First, ask yourself if you like the «idea» of it, or if you really have what it takes to make it happen. The point behind these two questions is time.

It’s OK to like the idea but not want to do it. It makes you no less of a person. In fact it shows that you know yourself and your capabilities. You have the wherewithal to make smart decisions and not waste your time or anyone around you.

If you know you have what it takes to make it happen, that makes you no better of a person. The same applies to you. You know yourself and your capabilities and have the wherewithal to make smart decisions.

Those who «like» ideas and try to go for it are the ones who end up taking the bat and ball home with a heavy heart. They tend to blame others for their shortcoming during that event. They now have become useless in their minds and project that onto others around them.

Those who «know» what it takes to make it happen shine and explode with power because they have now proved to themselves they have what it takes! They now have a «rock-star» mentality and everyone around them wants to celebrate with them! Paul says, “I have fought a good fight of faith, I have kept my faith, my crown awaits me”. Such are the results and rewards of sating up and fight another day, another battle, you can`t just be denied, NO you can`t.

So what does «it» take?

Sure determination and you have to «want» it badly enough. That’s it. Little facts or figures play into that feeling. In fact none do. It feels like you’re being called to do something extraordinary! Way too many of us spend too much time fighting that calling, the lure to go for it and jump without looking

14 июня, 2012

Posted by Coach_Speaks in Today's Devotional.
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14 июня, 2012

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OverAChairFeet's Bloginess

Slowing down to enjoy the moment. Patience. Such a huge teacher. There much be a special part of the brain that houses patience. How do you access it?

Impatience, though, springs forth from a lackful thought «I don’t have enough time.» Illusion. The reality is you always have 5 minutes.

These 5 minuteses pop up like rabbits when you start looking for them. They appear and wait, faithfully for us to grab them. These five minute segments of life must get lonely, waiting for our attention.

What a thought! That our time is patient with us! Is this moment tugging on your arm, like an adoring child, still asking sweetly for some gentle focus? It is easy to focus when the moment, or the child, is whining or wailing. By then, we are short tempered and flooded with emotion, not really fully present.

Being in the «now» may be a…

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O death, where is thy sting? 23 мая, 2012

Posted by Alyosha Kolodiy in Today's Devotional.
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Evangelist Reinhard Bonnke

Evangelist Reinhard Bonnke

One man had no intention of having «R.I.P.» (rest in peace) on his grave in Egypt. (Gen 50: 22-26). The mummy of Joseph was intended for export. Joseph knew the promises of God and what the future would hold, and he was determined not to be left out of it. Joseph, who died at the age of 110, wouldn’t even be found dead in Egypt. He was the man “who lived tomorrow”.
«By faith Joseph … gave commandment concerning his bones» (Heb 11:22). He didn’t want to lie quietly in the grave when the Red Sea and the River Jordan opened. When carried through the wilderness, Joseph’s bones did not rattle in the box, they rejoiced. There was more life in his bones, than in those who carried them. Joseph’s eye of faith saw the faithfulness of God fulfilling His word, that word which He had given to Abraham, Isaac and Jacob long before. In fact hundreds of years before it happened, Joseph shouted with the armies of men who, yet to be born, would bring down the walls of Jericho. Faith renews our youth. A man of faith, at the age of 110 years, is younger than a doubting teenager. So many of our young are «old» and futureless. They are the defeated crowd whose song is that of the Beatles: «Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away … I believe in yesterday.» Without God and without hope.” Where are the men of Joseph’s battalion today? Faith gives life to the fearful. Faith mocks at that king of terrors, death, and terrifies he who has the power of death, even the Devil. «O death, where is thy sting?» (1 Cor 15:55). Ready?

more fruits less leafs…stop hiding 16 мая, 2012

Posted by Alyosha Kolodiy in Today's Devotional.
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Bishop J-m Gilson-Levi

Bishop J-m Gilson-Levi

Understanding the fig tree being cursed: why did Jesus cursed the fig tree while it was not in a seasonal time for it to have fruits? Did Jesus cursed it really because of it ’s lack of fruits? Was he lead by his belly? Surely not…the explanation is in the text and in Genesis.

the Bible empathized he went to see the tree to find fruits while it was not the season…and the only thing he saw was leafs… so he cursed the tree and the day after when they came back the tree was dried dead. Could Jesus go against his word (remember he is the word) every tree will bear fruits in due season and then cursed it for not being fruitful?

Genesis will give us the answer:

Adam and eve were naked and after sin they discovered they were, so they did take leafs and dresses with it in order to hide their nudity. when God came he saw the leafs… he knew something had happened, he knew he will have to have the redemption plan activated, remember before Adam sinned God had already a plan of redemption, otherwise your name could not have been written in the book of life before the foundation of the world.

So God had to perform there the very first sacrifice, killed an animal to do them a covering… a dress, something to hide their nakedness.

So when Jesus saw the fig tree he remembered the purpose of his calling, he remembered the downfall of man, he remembered the sin, he remembered the seduction of the devil…he saw only the leafs and no fruits.

Many of us hide behind leafs (religion, titles, position, age, gray hairs…) and show no fruits. No sign of it in no season, because for us to be fruitful is in and out of season.

We hide behind money, elevation, knowledge of man, degrees and doctorates.

be careful hiding is a curse on itself and having no fruits is another curse, it is time for the church , the Christians to come out in the light and to show their fruits…if Jesus was passing by would he find fruits or leafs? When the son of man comes back will he find faith?

Shalom ,be blessed, your servant

The gospel is simple 11 мая, 2012

Posted by Alyosha Kolodiy in Today's Devotional.
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Bishop J-m Gilson-Levi

Bishop J-m Gilson-Levi

the gospel is simple, religious has made it difficult to understand, we tent to made our church members some sort of theologians knowing Hebrew, Greek and all the history but not knowing the Lord, we tent to have now in our church the most literate people, thinking so much and analyzing the wording… but now we neglected the basic, preaching the message to the world,healing the sick, sending the captive free… we are so complicated on our message under the cover of so called revelations, that no one growth spiritually no more, the church is becoming a mess, so dirty that we are not able to clean it ourselves..l. the most successful evangelist in this generation had a simple message , based on cross, resurrection, blood, repentance and baptism… not about all the Jewish feasts, the way to be rich, the theology, scatology and all other secondary matters, let us preach salvation, justification,purification,sanctification in other words the FAITH.
be blessed
your servant

Is children our future? 10 мая, 2012

Posted by Alyosha Kolodiy in Today's Devotional.
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Bishop J-m Gilson-LeviIs children our future?
Pro 22:6 If a child is trained up in the right way, even when he is old he will not be turned away from it.
Pro 23:13 Do not keep back training from the child: for even if you give him blows with the rod, it will not be death to him.
Eph 6:4 And, you fathers, do not make your children angry: but give them training in the teaching and fear of the Lord.
Children are our future, today the devil is trying to destroy this generation by discouraging the parents and the next one by having no fear of God.
The various government are taking all the parental AUTHORITY of the parents, a loud shout is abuse, a smack is abuse, a correction in front of others or publicly is considered as an abuse…
Now we can consider what it does to our kids not knowing the boundaries of what can be allowed and what is forbidden, there is no more limits of what a child can do, if they do not want to go to church, accordingly to the people we have elected, we should not force them.
What does it produce? Our kids are having sex at the age of 10, young kids are addicted to porn at the age of 6, it is now common practice for them to have homosexual relationship under the fact they have to discover their sexuality, gangs are increasing in number all around the world, our young men are killed daily, our young girls are being raped and abused, elderly people , ladies, and many men do not want to come out of their home after certain hours fearing to be attacked by youngsters.
Alcohol, drug, have replaced the bible teaching, satanic cults are expanding around the world making our kids becoming Goths, witches… experiencing the occultism.
Parents are being abused, mums crying because the child beat them up, dads wondering how they will pay for the fine the child had because of his bad behaviour…
Ministers s houses are obviously afflicted badly to, kids not willing to pray, kids rebellious in church, ….
Where are we going? Who is responsible? What can we do?
If we do not take back control of the boat we will be sinking , the responsibility is ours to be sure the various government are set up properly and give us back a balanced responsibility and authority ,
Protesting, writing to the very people we elected, and telling them we want our believe to be considered, we want to see the future generation in a better behaviour, we want to enjoy our children as children ( their politics are steeling their very childhood)… We need to come back unto the obedience of the word of God .
Psa 22:30 A seed shall serve him; it shall be accounted to the Lord for a generation.
Joshua 24:14-15 Now fear the Lord and serve him with all faithfulness. Throw away the gods your forefathers worshipped beyond the River and in Egypt, and serve the Lord. But if serving the Lord seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your forefathers served beyond the River, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living. But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord.
The fear of the Lord is the beginning of all wisdom…
Shalom to all .
Your servant