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4 14 Window It’s Time to Wake Up Сентябрь 16, 2011

Posted by Alyosha Kolodiy in Blogs, Актуальная проблема -problem of today, Новости - News, Трибуна братства - The brotherhood tribune, eMagazines.
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3 things making a church grow. Август 27, 2011

Posted by Alyosha Kolodiy in Библия говорит - Bible Speaks, Трибуна братства - The brotherhood tribune, Today's Devotional.
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1) Act 16:4 And as they went on their way through the cities, they delivered them the decrees to keep which had been ordained of the apostles and elders that were at Jerusalem. Act 16:5 So the churches were strengthened in the faith, and increased in number daily. the APOSTOLIC doctrine is preached… repentance, baptism,sanctification, baptism of the holy spirit and the signs and miracles. preaching Jesus Crucified and raised from the dead.

2) the evangelism. to let know the people of the outside that JESUS is the same yesterday today and for ever, to demonstrate the power of the word, to show love and compassion.

3) to keep the existing flock, to ban gossip and adopt gospel, to be one body in unity, to care one for another, to be the visible image of God on earth. that surely take effort to not be religious but to just simply follow the liberty of the chains of love in Christ. be blessed …Gen 1:28 And God blessed them: and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it; and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the birds of the heavens, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth.

 

Having a daily summit in your relationship Январь 27, 2010

Posted by Alyosha Kolodiy in Today's Devotional.
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By Herbert Mtowo

How To Have a Daily Peace Summit(In Relationships)

 In the political world it is common for leaders to come together for a special meeting known as a peace summit. The purpose is to try and stop all the fighting and learn to live together in peace and harmony. Whenever you have a group of people living together in the same house, the time will come sooner or later when you need to make peace. You cannot continue to live in a situation of conflict. This is something that you can develop also to use for the whole family. But let’s learn to use it firstly just for those in relationships married or dating and in courtship.

How to dealing with anger

Jesus gave clear instructions concerning anger, in the following verse: Ephesians 4:26 Be angry, but do not sin: do not let the sun set on your anger: In my writings and study on hurts, anger and bitterness, I have seen that there are two main kinds of anger mentioned in the New Testament. These are explosive anger and implosive anger. The kind of anger mentioned in this verse is the kind that is not explosive. You will all agree with me, that relationships bring out all the skeletons in the cupboard out. In relationships we all get angry at one time or the other. Anger is always with us as long as we relate to people. So what the Scripture is saying here is that you should learn to hold back your anger. But then you should learn to also let it go. This is so important, we all get angry one way or the other, but we should also be able to master our anger than having it master our emotions. Most Gender based violence cases areas a result of anger out of control, that’s why you find the world over people are going through anger management programmes. That is the way to go, people get treated from so many addictions, others go through sex addictions, and the whole purpose is to bring anger and these addictions under control. The first step is to admit that I have anger which is out of control, most people I talk to refuse that they have anger that needs to be dealt with. Now a person who explodes their anger usually let’s it go pretty easy, but they can often cause the other partner to respond with the other anger. So one has ‘let it off their chest’ while the other continues to brood and boil with anger.

Temperaments in marriage

 This kind of situation will always exist, because usually the temperaments in marriage will be such that one partner is more expressive than the other. So usually one of you will tend to be explosive, and the other will boil with anger. The key is to let all anger out before the day is over. That means no anger must exist by the time you go to bed that night. How do you do this? With correct communication! But how do you carry this out? One is ready to explode and tell the other what they think. The other is likely to avoid and keep it inside .Anger, bitterness and There is only one way to approach it, and that is what Jesus told us to do in the following passage: Matthew 7:3 And why do you look at the splinter that is in your brother’s eye, but do not consider the beam that is in your own eye? 4 Or how can you say to your brother, Let me pull the splinter out of your eye; and, look, a beam [is] in your own eye? 5 You hypocrite, first remove the beam out of your own eye; and then you will see clearly to remove the splinter out of your brother’s eye. Usually when a husband and wife have a conflict, each blames the other for the problem. But as is indicated in dealing with anger, it is necessary for you both to turn your attention to the problem instead of accusing each other.

Conference/s daily:

 So you must come together at least once each day, to share the things that are bothering you, or have made you angry. Sometimes it might be anger against your partner. Sometimes it might be anger against someone else. The key here is to help each other. So you start off with the following words: “I have a problem.” In this way you ‘look at your own beam’ first. And since your partner is not under the same burden of care as you, he or she can help you to break free. If you are angry with each other, or worried about the finances, or there is something else that is bothering you. You MUST deal with this before you go to sleep at night. And especially important, you must deal with it BEFORE YOU CONSIDER MAKING LOVE. As you learn to communicate better with each other, you can diffuse these things before they cause barriers to come between you. If you fail to do this, then you may be guilty of one or more of the three factors we mentioned in my article- stealing, lying and bad language. Learn to have a peace summit each day, and put to rest all your cares and concerns. You will sleep better and wake up feeling good the next day. And, more important, you will find that your love experience will blossom and the love making will become more wonderful than ever before

To obtain your blessings for 2010… Декабрь 17, 2009

Posted by Alyosha Kolodiy in Today's Devotional.
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Apex Kelly Lave

This is the condition and if you follow it will, you will not fail.

Get yourself ready to receive:
If you say YES i am willing and ready Lord…
Be it unto you according to your faith so prepare to receive your bountiful blessing which will come over you right now where you are sitting as you flow through this massage.

This is the first instruction from above if you are willing to receive such an uncommon blessing.

Imagine you as a huge vessel:
Be a large vessel with no taps below. Meaning your heart must be fully for God and God alone in every thing and in all areas of your life. God is saying that your heart is divided as He can see right now. Part to your self interest, part to your ministry, part to your wife, part to your children, part to your friends and many more taps some full and some half open. Can you see the picture of a vessel with the taps below it? Taps under your Vessel that makes you dry up from day to day when your focus are no inline with God’s will in your life.

Forbid this:
You say God is first in your life but you put other things first before him and He does not like that my dear friends. Please allow your vessel to be filled with the fulness of God. Don’t try doing things for others but allow yourself being filled up and overflowing. Allow the overflow to come from above and not from you opening the taps below which will mean or be seen as the blessings are from you. No No No says father God. He wants to be thee provider for all your needs without your help or doings. You much be filled to the bream without you doing anything apart from praising father God for all.

What happens when you are totally full:
Others will be blessed as you come around them. How do you like that people? Your appearance and presence will change the scene of the area. Because you are around people will be blessed by your being around them. Don’t you want that uncommon blessing? People will come running to you just to hear an encouraging word from you that will build there day.

Give glory to the Lord if this words have opened your eyes today to start a new chapter in your life before this year 2009 ends.

Hallelujah to Jesus….!!!!!!!

May father God richly and bountifully bless you all in all through the name of Jesus Christ our Lord and saviour.

Apostle K. Lave / Zurich, Switzerland.

The Value of Good timing Август 5, 2009

Posted by Alyosha Kolodiy in Актуальная проблема -problem of today, Библейские уроки-Bible lessons, Трибуна братства - The brotherhood tribune, Цитаты Великих - Great Quotes, eMagazines, PSYCHOLOGIE-ПСИХОЛОГИЯ, Today's Devotional.
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Herbert Mtowo

The value of timing

You and me are products of the decisions that we make or have made in life.I wish it can be said over and over again,timing is an important skill,or virtue when it comes to determining your tomorrow.They say procrastination is the thief of time.So many people live in regrets over what they could have done,opportunities that they have lost.

We need to be strategically positioned,but above all else we need to very good and sharp when it comes to timing.Am sure we have all heard this statement,»Being in the right place and at the right time»I cant have said it better than this for sure,timing is crucial in determining your success believe you me.The friends you hang out with,your mind set all positions you to the perfect time,life is full of people who have done extremely well successful,mail becoz of their ability to seize the times that came their way.Don’t live life regretting,make very good use of your time.Have you ever thought and imagined why we only celebrate birthday once in a year and not twice per year..?It simply means that,make the best of the times that you have today.

The bible is also full,of men and women who maximized the time in various opportunities and circumstances.There is no need to feel left out,your time is there for you,but you may not know that or fail to make great use of it.Do what you can while you can.Read the following and begin to realize that above all else time matters most and timing is crucial to what you are going to be and achieve in life.
There is a time for everything. So says Solomon in his supreme wisdom. Yet timing is a lost art for most people, especially in our opportunistic culture today. So, do you understand “times”? There’s a lot in the subject of time and timing. So this is just an introduction to the topic. You will remember that end time prophecies refer to such things as “time, times and half a time” (Daniel 12:7, Revelation 12:14).
Jesus knew the times and said of himself, “my time has not yet come” (John 7:6,8).
Members of one of the twelve tribes of Israel, Issachar, were noted for their ability to understand the times, thus knowing what Israel should do in various situations (1Chronicles 12:32). Knowing the significance of times and seasons enables people to make the right choice at the right time.
King Solomon gave us a poetic celebration of the reality of times and seasons.
“To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;
A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
A time to tear, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.” Ecclesiastes 3:1-8
The most sobering reflection on ‘time’ comes out of the life of Elisha, the powerful prophet of Israel, approx 850 years before Christ. After this man of God healed the Syrian leper, Naaman, he declined to accept the lavish and valuable gifts offered him by the grateful military captain. Elisha’s servant, Gehazi, however, had no qualms about getting a share of the goods and so he secretly went to Naaman and asked for some of the booty, which Naaman happily gave him. When Gehazi returned to his post Elisha challenged him, since the prophet knew by divine revelation what Gehazi had done.
Significant in Elisha’s challenge to Gehazi is the issue of ‘timing’.
“And Elisha said to him, Didn’t my heart go with you when the man (Naaman) turned from his chariot to meet you? Is it a time to receive money, and to receive garments, and olive-yards, and vineyards, and sheep, and oxen, and menservants, and maidservants?” 2Kings 5:26
Elisha knew something about timing that Gehazi did not know. It was not the right time to get wealth. Gehazi’s problem was not greed, nor deception, but ignorance of the time in which he was living.
Now, considering how vital timing is in such a case, how well are we acquainted with timing and seasons in our lives? I suspect that most of us think opportunity is all that is required. If there is an opportunity to get something then the opportunity speaks for itself. Many people end up in some kind of curse, just as Gehazi did, when they act without regard for the times and seasons.
I suggest we all need to be much more prayerful and sensitive to times and seasons. We need to seek God for insight and revelation about how times and seasons impact our lives

Check Your Ego in Relationships Август 3, 2009

Posted by Alyosha Kolodiy in Актуальная проблема -problem of today, Трибуна братства - The brotherhood tribune, Цитаты Великих - Great Quotes, eMagazines, PSYCHOLOGIE-ПСИХОЛОГИЯ, Today's Devotional.
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Herbert Mtowo

EGO IN RELATIONSHIPS CAN BE VERY DESTRUCTIVE I say something over and over again (because it is so important!): To be able to truly love yourself and love someone else, you must drop the ego. This is absolutely essential to finding an amazing relationship. It’s equally critical to maintaining and continually improving a relationship once you’re already in it. To Annita and several others in relationships, this is extremely important.Hope you find this inspiring and worth reading.. Nothing will kill a relationship — even the best of relationships — more quickly than ego. Here are five ways your ego can ruin your relationship, and how to avoid letting it happen. 1. Your ego is on guard duty. Resist the temptation to defend yourself. Think about the number of times you’ve fought with a significant other, and whenever things get a little heated you start to defend yourself. All you hear is yourself being attacked, and you immediately go into «defending yourself» mode. Do you know that when you defend yourself in a fight, what’s really happening is your ego is defending itself? It also means that you’ve stopped listening to the other person. If your partner tells you that they don’t like the way you’ve been acting lately, why not hear them out instead of defending yourself? It will almost always create a MUCH better outcome. 2. Your ego is stuck to you. To love yourself and someone else completely, you must separate the ego. In order to truly love someone, you must separate your ego from yourself. This is also true if you want to be able to totally love yourself. Now, I know that in a perfect world, we would never be ego-driven. This is not a perfect world, of course, so let’s get real. We are all ego-driven to some extent or another, so let’s acknowledge it and embrace that we need to detach the ego to cultivate and maintain a truly amazing relationship with someone. 3. Your ego hates feedback. The truth is that no matter how much you prepare, plan, and hope for a good conversation with your significant other, your ego is the one thing that will consistently ruin any conversation you’re about to have, if you let it. Let’s say your significant other is frustrated with you in one way or another and really needs to express something about that to you. How do you respond? If you let your ego get involved and you defend yourself, it means that you’re not listening to your partner. In order to really listen to somebody, it’s uncomfortable. Sometimes your significant other has things to say about you that you would rather not hear. To maintain a great relationship, however, you can’t let your ego keep you from truly listening. 4. Your ego is always active. You have to be willing to drop the ego and learn to have a healthy relationship. If you want to get deep with someone and take your relationship to a higher level, you must take your ego out of the equation. Your significant other is going to do things that you don’t recognize. It may be voices, patterns, communication styles, or other traits with which you aren’t familiar. You need to be open and willing to learn these things about your partner, and your ego will keep you from doing this every time. Most importantly, you need to learn your partner’s communication style, because many times it will be very different from your own. Dropping the ego doesn’t mean you need to change who you are. It can take a lot for you to drop your ego, to really listen to your significant other, and to realize that they need you to say something in a different way. A lot of people misunderstand these kinds of requests as being their partner’s attempt to change them. It’s not. They’re not trying to change you; they are trying to improve the way you communicate with each other. Don’t let your ego get in the way. Embrace this! 5. Your ego launches low blows. Do you get frustrated when you’re having an argument with your significant other? Of course, we all do. When that happens, though, sometimes the ego will cause you to hurl hurtful comments at the other person. You’re feeling hurt, so you lash out and say something you know will make the other person hurt, too. It was not only hurtful, but inevitably something stupid. By listening to your partner rather than lashing out from your ego, you can get through an argument without these low blows, and arguments will be much more constructive — not destructive — to your relationship. So the next time you see your ego getting involved in your relationship, get rid of it! If you find yourself defending yourself or not allowing yourself to really listen, then you need to take a step back. Listen carefully to what’s really being said, and use it to create the most amazing relationship

Mighty To Save Июль 25, 2009

Posted by Alyosha Kolodiy in Цитаты Великих - Great Quotes, Relevant songs, Today's Devotional.
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Everyone needs compassion,
Love that’s never failing;
Let mercy fall on me.

Everyone needs forgiveness,
The kindness of a Saviour;
The Hope of nations.

Saviour, He can move the mountains,
My God is Mighty to save,
He is Mighty to save.

Forever, Author of salvation,
He rose and conquered the grave,
Jesus conquered the grave.

So take me as You find me,
All my fears and failures,
Fill my life again.

I give my life to follow
Everything I believe in,
Now I surrender.

My Saviour, He can move the mountains,
My God is Mighty to save,
He is Mighty to save.
Forever, Author of salvation,
He rose and conquered the grave,
Jesus conquered the grave.

Shine your light and let the whole world see,
We’re singing for the glory of the risen King…Jesus (x2)

My Saviour, He can move the mountains,
My God is Mighty to save,
He is Mighty to save.
Forever, Author of salvation,
He rose and conquered the grave,
Jesus conquered the grave.

My Saviour, you can move the mountains,
You are mighty to save,
You are mighty to save.
Forever, Author of Salvation,
You rose and conquered the grave,
Yes you conquered the grave

Русский перевод-Елена Чуенко

Нужно всем состраданье
Любовь, что бесконечна
И благодать Твоя!

Нужно так всем спасенье,
Спасителя любезность,
Надежда мира.

Спаситель
Может сдвинуть горы!
Силён Господь мой спасти,
Всех силён Он спасти.

Вовеки, Он – Творец спасенья!
Воскрес и смерть победил,
Смерть Иисус победил!

Возьми мои паденья,
Страхи и сомненья,
Жизнь наполни вновь!
Тебе отдам все дни я,
Всё, во что я так верю,
В Твоих руках, Бог!

Спаситель
Может сдвинуть горы!
Силён Господь мой спасти,
Всех силён Он спасти.

Вовеки, Он – Творец спасенья!
Воскрес и смерть победил,
Смерть Иисус победил!

Яркий свет Твой пусть видит вся земля,
Мы будем петь во славу воскресшего Царя! (2р.)

Спаситель
Может сдвинуть горы!
Силён Господь мой спасти,
Всех силён Он спасти.

Вовеки, Он – Творец спасенья!
Воскрес и смерть победил,
Смерть Иисус победил!

Спаситель
Может сдвинуть горы!
Силён Господь мой спасти,
Всех силён Он спасти.

Вовеки, Он – Творец спасенья!
Воскрес и смерть победил,
Смерть Иисус победил!

The Woman Июль 24, 2009

Posted by Alyosha Kolodiy in Актуальная проблема -problem of today, Библейские уроки-Bible lessons, Трибуна братства - The brotherhood tribune, Цитаты Великих - Great Quotes, eMagazines, PSYCHOLOGIE-ПСИХОЛОГИЯ, Today's Devotional.
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Herbert Mtowo

Old Higgins watched with wonder. He had never seen a woman with such irrepressible zeal for her role. Here was a wonder mum indeed.
He watched as she intercepted the scuttling feet and caught her son into her arms, despite his protests and cries. “Look, you’re a bird! Look how you can fly!” She swung him to the left and right and chuckled as she did. He kicked and screamed and demanded the right to run, but she pulled him to her chest and pointed to the sheep on the hill. “Look at the sheep. How many sheep are there?”
While Higgins and others scanned the flock to make their estimate the boy would have none of it. He kicked his mother and pulled his arms free from her hold. “Let me go!” He demanded. “Would you like some food?” the wonder mum asked sweetly. “Let’s see what mummy has in her bag for you.” The boy settled and stood at her side as she opened her huge bag.
At The Station
“What an amazing woman”, each onlooker thought, as they waited for the train. This wonder mum had struggled with her implacable child for over twenty minutes, and just kept on being calm, enthusiastic and positive. Just about every other person would gladly have thrashed the boy, but the mother was determined to win him over with her winsome ways and her never-ending store of surprises and delights.
After just a bite or two the food was thrown to the ground and a loud complaint bellowed forth. “Oh dear”, thought the weary crowd. They had hoped for success this time. Higgins found his muscles tighten yet again at the pitch of the boy’s scream.
And so it continued another twenty minutes. Food, drink, games, distractions, tickles, toys, song and dance spun past in a constant stream of ineffectual efforts. The crowd was exhausted, but amazed to see the stamina of the wonder mum, who pressed on through it all.
When the train finally arrived everyone became distracted in the bustle for their allocated seats. Wonder mum found the energy to carry her problem child and her bags onto the carriage.
Higgins was relieved to find himself in a different car to the wonder mum. He wondered how he would have survived even being near the child for the day’s journey. He would tell his daughter all about this wonder mum, when he arrived for dinner.
The Exhausted Mum
He had just settled into his seat when, to his dismay, a woman and child arrived to sit opposite. Rage rose in his face and a scowl formed on his lips. This young lad was almost identical to the monster tormenting and exhausting the crowd for the past hour. Burying himself in his paper he silently resented the injustice of the seating.
The woman was too tired to give much attention to her boy. He asked her several questions and wanted various things to amuse him. But she could not muster the energy to attend to his requests. She simply told him to read his book and keep quiet.
As the hours passed Higgins saw the boy sit contented at his play as the tired mum dozed. When the lad had an issue his mother gave clear direction which he followed. She was too tired or sick to amuse him for a moment, yet he seemed perfectly willing to accept that limitation and face his day compliant to her demands.
In time Higgins chatted with the toddler and found him to be polite and respectful.
The Lucky Mum
This was indeed a lucky mum. She did not need to be a wonder mum, with such a compliant child.
When the woman revived she answered Higgins’ questions. No, her son was not born ‘good’. He had presented her with demands, tantrums and wilfulness, just as they both had seen in the other boy that morning. She had dealt with it firmly, despite his protests. She had disciplined him and trained him to obey her instructions, even when he did not want to. She punished him with sufficient severity to convince him that he was wisest to obey.
She had now trained him to be no difficulty to those around him and she could have peace and confidence despite being unwell or tired, for her son would not be a problem to himself or others. She had neither bag of tricks nor endless energy. She did not have the stamina of the wonder mum in the other carriage. And she did not believe a child should be allowed to disrupt life for others.
At the Destination
At their destination angry passengers escaped from one carriage after a tortuous day with the wonder mum and her rebellious son. As the crowd gathered to collect their bags the mother, still struggling with her wilful boy, smiled her apologies to people too upset to notice. Near her, the other mum had sufficient strength to collect her things and move quietly, with her son, to the exit.
Higgins observed both mums and looked on with pity as the long-suffering wonder mum struggled with her rebel and her bags.
Wonder Mum
That night Higgins told his daughter about an amazing mum he had seen that day. A woman who made a lasting impression on him and who he would like her to learn from and be like. He also told her about the foolish mum who tortured herself and everyone else by not disciplining her rebellious child.

Marriage and Relationships,make the best out of what you have. Июль 23, 2009

Posted by Alyosha Kolodiy in Актуальная проблема -problem of today, Библейские уроки-Bible lessons, Трибуна братства - The brotherhood tribune, eMagazines, PSYCHOLOGIE-ПСИХОЛОГИЯ, Today's Devotional.
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6 комментариев

Herbert Mtowo

What It Takes to Be One Love alone won’t see you through., in an age when we have plastic marriages, plastic relationships, one may ask what does it take to have one strong and lasting happy relationship or marriage. My heart bleeds with pain as I write this article I just had a call from Windhoek from a colleague telling me of someone I had counseled as a practicing counselor it pains to get the news. He beat his wife to death, a very young couple they were, the man in his mid twenties and the woman in her early twenties. As I write this to you friends you realize how heavy my heart is at the loss of life, as the precious woman is dead, brutally in the name of love. Her dreams, aspirations and pursuits are all cut short. That`s why I put together a collection of thoughts just to check on you, and encourage you to be realistic and face the challenges of relationships with hope. What follows below may inspire you, enjoy and give comments freely. The sight of a couple sharing a joke and walking hand in hand, their faces lined all over with wrinkles, and their hair gray, begs the question: How did they remain a happy couple for so many years? Given that about half of all first marriages for men and women under 45 end in divorce, it’s a legitimate question. Their revelations may surprise you. «It’s not about how much you love each other, or how much money you have, or even if your personalities match,» Far more significant than these factors — yes, even more important than heart-pounding lust, which, let’s face it, often fades over time — is communication.. How well you and your spouse communicate with another? The second most significant factor that happy couples share, is a strong friendship. While you can’t necessarily teach a couple how to be friends, you can teach good friends how to communicate better. Developing Healthy Habits Three important ingredients of happy couples: • Avoid blowouts. «The first is to learn to talk without fighting about inevitable conflicts,». Making a concerted effort to see the other person’s perspective, and avoiding the blame game of «she said» or «he did,» goes a long way. When things appear to be hedging toward a blowout. Do what parents often tell young children: Take a «time out.» It’s a tactic he calls «exiting out of destructive fighting.» • Recall the positive. As parents often ask a child stewing in the time-out corner what she could have done differently, Couples in conflict take time to consider what brought them together in the first place. Then make room for those factors in your life again. «You’ve got to protect and preserve those positive connections — the friendship, the fun,» • Look to the future. While turning the clock back can help couples rekindle lost connections, I urge couples to simultaneously look forward. «You’ve got to have pretty long term vision of the future, shared dreams, and plans that represent a commitment to one another and your family,» Addressing a Sexless Marriage That future, according to most marriage experts, should include a healthy sex life. While sex isn’t everything to happy couples, sexual problems can lead to marital discord. That men and women tend to have different ideas about sex doesn’t help matters. Addressing a Sexless Marriage «Generally speaking, women tend to see sexuality as part of a larger construct. Men are exactly the opposite. «Women have to be in the mood. Men have to be in the room.» Many times, misunderstandings over these differences lead to a break down in a health relationship sexually within a marriage, even among happy couples. The result, is a sexless marriage. I call sexless marriages an «epidemic. Many of the married clients haven’t had sex in 10 years. Adopt a business approach to improve sex. Seeing things from a business-like perspective helps couples reframe their sexual relationship. «I tell them, ‘If this were a business, would you let it flounder like this?'» Presenting sex in this light makes problems, and solutions, more concrete for couples. «By likening it [marriage] to a business mode — with shared goals and missions; responsibilities, assets, and liabilities; and frequent business meetings — things shift,» Make honest assertions. To salvage their sex lives, some couples need to dig deeper. «Often, sex wasn’t good in the first place. A big complaint for women is that foreplay is bad or nonexistent,» But this isn’t easy for anyone to admit. «I do a lot of pushing for the truth,» Some couples simply aren’t prepared to tell, or hear, the truth. «A lot of couples fall out of it. It pushes too many buttons,» Learning Financial Savvy The topic of family finances is another hot-button topic, even for happy couples. Delegate the task of budget balancer. Experts observe that most happy couples recognize that handling household finances should remain a singular task. «Only one person can work the checkbook. There can’t be two CFOs,» That doesn’t mean, however, that the other partner should be kept in the dark about finances. Sheridan espouses making joint financial decisions, with just one person implementing. Start an emergency fund. I also strongly urge couples to plan for financial emergencies. This helps diffuse any potential blowups, such as who will sacrifice personal spending money when urgent house repairs must be funded. Every couple faces adversity, from slumps in their sex lives to bickering over the checkbook balance. Most married people can learn to become happy couples. «If both partners are motivated, they can turn things around. Hi guys make the best of your time and enjoy your relationships, whether dating or married, make the best of them

Кого любить? Июнь 28, 2009

Posted by Alyosha Kolodiy in Актуальная проблема -problem of today, Библейские уроки-Bible lessons, Библия говорит - Bible Speaks, Трибуна братства - The brotherhood tribune, Today's Devotional.
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Алексей Колодий

Евангелие от Луки 6:27-36, один из тех «колючих» отрывков писания, которые очень трудно принять. Не то чтобы он был не понятен, скорее он неудобен в исполнении. Причин тому несколько. Одна из них, это наша склонность в проблемах винить других людей, не проявляя понимание и снисходительность, а в некоторых случаях долготерпение и прощение. Тем более, этот эпизод описывает случаи, в которых, нам причиняют вред и поступают против нас вероломно. Когда ты обижен, очень трудно трезво оценить ситуацию. Обида, непрощение и страх, подавляют способность нашего разума находить приемлемый выход из трудных ситуаций.

Но, тут Иисус идет дальше и говорит нам, чтобы мы не просто были снисходительны и долготерпеливы. Он, так же заповедует нам выступать с конкретным решением проблемы, предлагая шаги, которые нам нужно предпринять. Подход, который часто практикуется людьми под дивизом: «на дураков не обижаются», в этом случает не приемлем.

Есть несколько ключевых слов, над которыми необходимо размышлять. Любите, делайте добро, благословляйте и молитесь.

» — Вам, слушающим Меня, Я говорю: — Любите ваших врагов, делайте добро тем, кто ненавидит вас,
благословляйте тех, кто проклинает вас, и молитесь о тех, кто оскорбляет вас.»

Эти слова обращены ко всем, кто может слышать. Слышать в библейском смысле означает понимать, принимать и поступать. Но так же, это слово означает буквально слышание. Это значит, что любой, кто фактически услышал эти слова, дожен исполнять их для своего же блага. Господь призывает не ждать, пока нас поймут, нам отдадут должное, начнут ценить нас, а самим предпринимать шаги в поиске решения. Любовь вместо ненависти, делание добра вместо мести, благословение вместо проклятий, молитва вместо растеряного пожимания плечами.

«Ударившему тебя по щеке подставь и другую, а тому, кто забирает у тебя плащ, не мешай забрать и рубаху.»

Насилию, противопоставляется пожертвование и милосердие. Очень сильно Иисус проилюстрировал этот принцип говоря: «Никто ее (жизнь) у Меня не может отнять, Я отдаю ее добровольно. У Меня есть власть отдать ее и взять ее опять. Так было Мне определено Моим Отцом.»(Иоан.10:18) Поистине, невозможно у нас забрать то, что мы отдаем добровольно.

 «Каждому, кто у тебя просит, дай; и если кто-то заберет твою вещь, не требуй ее обратно.» Очень часто нам приходится давать в долг и самим брать взаймы. Долги это одна из самых острых причин разрушения отношений между людьми. Когда у меня занимают деньги и я способен дать займ, я руководствуюсь простым принципом, который мне помогает уже долгие годы. «Давай ровно столько, сколько ты можешь позволить себе потерять» Если я в позиции должника, то тут руководит другой принцип, «Не оставайтесь должными никому, ничем». Это подразумевает, что нам необходимо освобождаться от долгов в кратчайшие сроки.

» Делайте другим то, что вы хотели бы, чтобы они сделали вам.»
Эти слова не о корыстолюбии, а о том, что мы находимся во взаимодействии причинно-следственных связей. Все, что мы делаем на земле, возвращается к нам в этой жизни, а если не так, то оно идет за нами в вечность. Когда мы думаем, говорим или поступаем с кем то несправедливо, мы должны понимать, что рано или поздно, все это в полной мере вернет к нам. Как и добрые дела, совершенные нами, не могут не отразится на нашей настоящей жизни или будущей.

«Если вы любите тех, кто любит вас, в чем ваша заслуга? Ведь даже грешники любят тех, кто их любит. Если вы делаете добро тем, кто делает добро вам, то в чем ваша заслуга? Ведь даже грешники делают то же. Если вы даете в долг только тем, от кого надеетесь получить обратно, то в чем ваша заслуга? Ведь даже грешники дают в долг грешникам, ожидая получить назад столько же. Но вы любите ваших врагов, делайте им добро, и давайте в долг, не ожидая возврата. Тогда ваша награда будет велика, и вы будете сыновьями Всевышнего, потому что Он сам так же добр к неблагодарным и злым. Будьте милосердны, как ваш Отец милосерден. (Лук.6:27-36)

Любить тех, кто любит тебя, делать добро для тех, кто помогает тебе -это очень просто и само собой разумеется. Но наш личностный рост происходит тогда, когда мы выходим за рамки привычного и удобного. Мышцы растут, когда ты тренируешь их, чувства укрепляются, когда ты работаешь над ними. Рост, через боль и тяжелый труд над собой. Не возможно изменить кого то и повлиять на кого то,  предварительно не изменив себя. Наша жизнь, это не попытки изменить мир и людей вокруг нас, а перемены, которые мы производим в себе. Они видоизменяют не только нас, но и все, что нас окружает, а так же тех, с кем мы строим отношения.